1. |
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As my bones grow brittle and the bottles of wine continue collecting in the cracks and lines of my face and my skin and the spaces within, growing white with scars of countless sins. I'll remember the reason, the regretful times. I'll fight for the anger, the chords and the rhymes that clench up my fist and make my heart a soft black. Bring a light to my eyes that I normally lack. I still dream of cocktails and oily rags, and the burning of cop cars and systems and flags.
The history repeats the same themes of defeat. We keep penning the words we continue to eat. Our failures rain down, a mix of hate, fear and sleet. We can't slow down, can't lessen the speed. I'm too scared to die young, too scared to live fast, but I'll hold contradictions I made in the past. I'll cut idols down and hold others high, keep these words in my heart until the day that I die. "I was early to finish, I was late to start, I might be an adult, I'm a minor at heart."
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2. |
Shipwrecked
02:38
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I've grown bored and I've grown ready to crash this ship into the jetties, to break my bones against these rocks. My lap's been run, and I've been clocked. Its been running far too long, I may be young but I'm far gone. Don't waste your words, no not on me, because all I'm left are guilty pleas. And guilty thoughts and guilty pleas. Leave me hanging, let me bleed.
Don't bring me back, don't bring me home, to the places that I've known, to the faces that have shown it's from them that I've outgrown. Don't bring me home, don't bring me back, don't reel me in, just cut my slack. Let me float so far off track. I'm shipwrecked bound and that's a fact.
Forget my words, forget my name. Forget my anger, fear and shame. Forget this ringer I put you through. Forget I breathed the same air as you. I searched for hope and found dismay. I traded hope for evil ways. These heavy anchors rule my day. Set me free, let me float away. Can't wash these hands, they're stained for good. I never tried, although I should.
I felt so high I did not think that all good things must start to sink, that all good flesh must start to stink. So let's get drunk and drive off the brink.
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3. |
Disbelief
02:27
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If you offer a heaven I'll hate it. If you offer a hell, I'll embrace it. If you offer salvation I'll spit in your face, because you want nothing more than my eternal disgrace, for the cycles of lies that I never can trace, for the crimes that my mind will never erase.If you offer a savior and say he's the one, I'll throw my head back and curse at the sun.. I'll curse at the sky until his reign is done, for as long as I scorn him I'll know that I've won.
If you offer an out, I won't take it. If you offer a pit, I'll embrace it. If you offer God's house, then I'll take this wrench and destroy the foundation and tear down this fence. I'll take this shovel and dig my own trench, and go back underground, the world's happiest wrench. You'll know that you've lost when you see I still bleed, when you see me take credit for destructive deeds, when you see me give in to these perverted needs, you'll know what I am and that nobody died for me.
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4. |
Bastards
02:48
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With a flask in pocket I'll scour the earth searching for the pit from which I was birthed. Because these blue eyes, they were destined to lie. With blood on my lips and hate on my tongue that follows the veins from my heart to my lungs. And when I pass, nothing will last. No one will come to say their good-byes, no priest there to recount my lies. And you'll say to yourself "I always could tell" because bastards like me, we all burn in hell.
There's good guys and bad guys and bastards like us, who no one should love, believe in or trust. The strings of our hearts are all covered in rust. We want nothing more than a world turned to dust.
In this empty place I'll patiently wait and contemplate what will be my fate. What will become of this poisoned mind that spits contempt for all humankind? Because I can't create, I can only destroy with these sordid words I'm forced to deploy. And yes you could say its my soul I did sell, because bastards like me, we all burn in hell.
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5. |
Awesome Horses
02:46
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I'm the shit that you can't scrape off of your shoes. I'm the clot in your heart that you just never knew. I'm the pit in your stomach that predicts what's to come. I'm the trash that's just trash, never treasure to some. I'm the false hope of grand feats that never work out. I'm the pressure to change when you don't have the clout. I'm the one spot of dirt you can't wash from your hands. I'm the wrench in the gears of all future plans. I'm the bug in the walls, the rat, the snake. I'm the feeling of fear that you just can't escape.
Your biting your tongue, disguising our hate,'till my story is told, and I fade away. But you're lacing your shoes, waiting for the day, that my heart stops and you can dance on my grave.
I'm the last comic scream of a worm now turned bait. I'm the one who finds love, just to trade it for hate. I'm the permanent black mark, the door you can't close, who you pass on the street and you choose to ignore. I'm the fly in the ointment of a perpetual burn, the unfortunate meeting that makes your luck turn. I'm the one drink too many, the thing you regret, the shaky foundation you shouldn't have bet. I'm a scar from a scab, a dream you once had of a terrible itch that was driving you mad.
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